WHY WE ENVY WOMEN
Views expressed in this article are not necessarily those of Transformation.
In our present society there is no room for an intersexed person. Society demands that we be either male or female. This is dictated from the moment of birth when the doctor announces “It’s a boy!” or “It’s a girl!”. From this moment on, the infant’s fate is sealed and his/her training starts in earnest. The decision is made as to which colour the baby will wear – pink or blue. We call this the pink blanket / blue blanket syndrome.
While we agree that SEX is determined by what is between the legs (the method employed by the medical profession), we can’t agree that this should automatically determine the infant’s GENDER for the rest of its life. The very existence of homosexuals, transsexuals, transvestites and transgenderists proves that nature is far more complicated than that.
“Sex” is determined by the visible anatomical organs that a person is born with, and it is impossible to change this sex, in spite of what some doctors might claim. The so-called “sex change” simply leaves a castrated and mutilated male. The man has been provided with an orifice that looks remarkably like a vagina, but of course, it isn’t. It is simply a tube closed at its inner end and serves no purpose except to provide an orifice to receive a male penis during intercourse.
The breasts of such a man / woman are often made of silicone and are incapable of serving their natural purpose – feeding a baby. It is also impossible for the sex-changed male to conceive a baby, since none of the necessary internal organs, such as ovaries and womb, are present.
We believe that many men who have the sex change operation really desire a ‘gender change’, which can be done without surgery, and for whom surgery may in fact be the worst solution.
Gender is invisible. It is in the very soul of each human being. It is the learned behaviour pattern of each individual, described by society as masculine or feminine. Usually there is no conflict between “sex” and “gender”. Sex is what you are born with, and gender is the behaviour pattern you are taught.
A man’s sperm contains two factors. They are called the X and Y sperm cells. A woman’s egg contains only female X cells. At the moment of conception, when the man’s sperm enters the women’s egg in the womb, the sex of the child is determined. It takes X + X to produce a female, and X + Y to produce a male.
The foetus contains ALL the necessary information to develop into a boy or a girl. The foetus is asexual until about the 4th month of pregnancy. At this stage, if the child is to be a boy, and this is determined by the presence of the Y factor, the glands which will become the testicles will move towards their natural position. The penis will continue to develop and the gland which would have developed into a womb becomes the male’s prostate gland. All this is brought about by hormones secreted at vital stages as a result of the Y factor from the father’s sperm.
If the child is to become a girl, the same glands which bacame the boy’s testicles will remain inside the body and become the ovaries. The womb will continue to develop and the development of the penis is halted, becoming the clitoris.
Two facts become clear. First, the sex of the child is determined by the father. Second, there are far fewer differences between men and women than our social order is willing to admit. In fact, men and women are basically the same, except for the reproductive organs and the associated hormones that go with them.
But, from the moment of birth, training starts to make the infant behave in a masculine or feminine manner, determined solely on which set of sexual organs happens to be between the legs at birth. The soul of this infant isn’t considered at all and it is a matter of “You will do as you’re told and not what your nature dictates”.
Boys will be given toys such as guns, tanks, cars and construction kits, all things which will make him aggressive, competitive and, dare we say it, destructive. It doesn’t take a genius to see that children’s television shows are also designed to reinforce this attitude among boys. Boys must be tough, and their training is designed to remove any softness or vulnerability, which is regarded as ‘sissy’.
Girls, on the other hand, are given sewing kits, tea sets, doll’s houses and miniature household appliances. Everything designed to ensure that the little girl will grow up into a loving, gentle and caring woman. She is trained to be a mother and housewife, whether she likes it or not.
Pity the poor boy who prefers playing with dolls rather than guns! It doesn’t matter if being gentle and loving is part of his nature. If he wants to take an interest in his mother’s cooking or any other ‘feminine pursuits’ he will be severely dealt with. Such ‘sissy’ ideas must be removed from his mind at all costs!
‘Tom Boy’ behaviour among little girls doesn’t seem to draw such drastic corrective measures. In fact, daddy rather likes his tom-boy daughter. But this same daddy will not tolerate any sissy behaviour from his son – in fact, he will be utterly disgusted.
We believe the term ‘sissy’ should enjoy the same status as ‘Tom Boy’. This would be a start in correcting our hopelessly confused social training process, the classic situation in which the only acceptable interests for men seem to be sport, drink and cars – women, on the other hand, are expected to be interested only in babies, cake recipes and gossip.
This situation is graphically illustrated at parties. Man and wife arrive together but immediately seperate to join male or female groups. And why should hubby and wife stay together? They don’t even speak the same language! Men feel that women will only spoil their fun and women feel that men will stifle their conversation.
Men stand on one side with their beers, talking about who will win the football, while the women gossip and watch anxiously how many drinks their husbands are having.
Women readers will say: “But men don’t have to be that way!”. You are right. But unless a man wishes to be a social outcast, he will behave like that. Our social order demands it.
I suspect that many men would prefer to join in the female gossip, talking about fashion or hair styles, but wouldn’t dare.The fear of being called a sissy is too great! Women have long been fighting for their rights – these include whether to have children or not, equal pay and the right to dress as they please. This has resulted in women moving into what were previously exclusively masculine domains, competing with men for the top jobs and salaries that go with them. The truth is that women are winning the ‘battle of the sexes’. Many job categories have been taken over by women.
Take, for example, public relations. Who wants to deal with a balding or grey-headed man in a suit when they can have an attractive woman, stylishly dressed with beautiful hair to represent them?
Other fields where the same thing is happening are advertising and estate agents. In every job where appearance is important you’ll find a woman. Women make the best sales persons. Even the motor trade will realise this soon.
Women take the trouble to groom themselves, to look young, beautiful, vibrant and alive. Men, on the other hand, cannot use make-up to improve their appearance. They don’t use creams on their faces to keep the aging process at bay. Their fashions are often, to say the least, dull. Men have to be satisfied with what they were born with.
Women are now moving strongly into engineering, electronics, architecture and the medical profession. It is now a fact that women make better drivers, pilots and doctors.
All this is proving to be a tremendous threat to men. The advertising profession is breaking down the male ego by depicting him as a useless, idiotic buffoon. In television advertising you find it is the man who makes a mess of things and the woman who comes to the rescue. A lot of television programs follow the same theme.
Imagine a little boy seeing all these television programmes. He will model himself on the parent he most admires. Even if his father is a strong personality, that may not be enough to convince him that maleness is the preferred role. If the father is weak the boy has no choice but to model himself on his mother and those beautiful, successful females he sees on television. Here you have the beginnings of gender confusion.
The boy either accepts his indoctrination and the social order as it is or he fights it. If he fights it, he either becomes homosexual (because he fears female domination) or he joins the ranks of women. This usually means he becomes a fetishist, a transvestite, a transgenderist or a transsexual.
In any of these cases the man will find himself loving and envying women their relaxed and indeed, lately, elevated social status. Today our entire social order is geared towards the likes and dislikes of women. It has become a matter of social survival for men.
At this point it might be useful to give a breakdown of the various related cross dressing activities to show where transgenderism fits in.
Fetishists are attracted, mostly, to feminine underwear, high-heeled shoes and stockings. Sometimes they steal women’s underwear from washing lines and shops. For them, the wearing of feminine clothing is solely a stimulant for sexual gratification.
This sexual release could be by masturbation or with an understanding female partner. Both partners will behave in a typically heterosexual manner with intercourse taking place in the usual fashions.
The fetishist, by his very behaviour, accumulates a lot of guilty feelings, which normally cause stress releated problems later in life.
From the fetish stage it is a very short step for a male to want to dress in a completely feminine costume. At first, it is usuzlly out of curiosity “just to see what I look like”. Then he discovers he likes what he sees in the mirror.
The next stage occurs when the man enjoys what he is doing so much that he starts toying with the idea of going out in public dressed as a woman.
Now the transvestite will start to look at his appearance critically for the first time. He will note where he needs to improve in order to pass as a woman in public, probably buy a wig, learn the art of applying make-up through fashion amgazines (or his wife or girlfirend if she is willing to play along) and will learn which styles of dresses, skirts, blouses and shoes will best suit his figure. If successful in perfecting an acceptable feminine appearance he will venture out i public in a very limited way.
At this stage the sexual element in the man’s dressing decreases and he becomes more conscious of the feminine side of his nature. However, he is still very much a male and will pursure his normal manly interests such as sport and drinking sessions with his friends. In fact, he often overcompensates and becomes aggressively macho. Only at infrequent times will his feminine element come to the fore and demand his attention.
The next stage creeps up on the transvestite in a very subtle fashion. He finds himself envying the world of women, the wide selection of clothing and accessories available to them and their freedom in not having to wear a wig or ‘falsies’.
The real changes start when he develops a strong desire for a more feminine figure to “hang his clothes on”, in particular to posess his own breasts. By then he has usually resorted to shaving his legs and arms, and may even have begun to get his beard removed by electrolysis or plucking.
In his search for help he is vulnerable to traditional medical dogma which, through ignorance, tries to convinve him to either quit or else have a sex change. Neither are what he really needs or wants.
He now becomes very dissatisfied with the masculine gender role. He will embark on a course of feminising himself as far a possible, including the taking of female hormones if he can find himself a willing and understanding doctor. He has not turned his back on his male side, he has merely changed priorites, wanting to live as a woman while remaining a male.
He / she will be living as a woman at every possible opportunity, resenting the occasions when he / she has to dress as a man. Sexual attraction and release, however, remain heterosexual. There are no signs of homosexuality, although some transgenderists may call themselves male lesbians.
It is possible that he / she will undergo the first stages of a sex change – breast implants, removal of the testicles, but these acts are gender motivated in order to feminise the body as mouch as possible, and not sexually motivated.
This is usually the point at which the true transgenderist comes to terms with what it is possible to accomplish. He / she is usually living as a woman full time by now and has had to sacrifice a certain portion of ‘his’ sex life. Any further operations can only be sexually motivated.
This group can usually be differentiated from the preceding cases by a strong desire for an active sex life in which they wish to be the recipient of the male organ and need the necessary equipment. The transsexual will deny any allegation of homosexuality as he regards himself as a female trapped in the wrong body.
This is the fundamental difference between a transgenderist and a transsexual. The transgenderist desires a gender change, but his sexual interests remain the same as any normal male’s; the transsexual wants sexual relations with men.
Only a small percentage of men who have the sex change operation are truly satisfied. They will never be able to bear children and will always wonder if there are traces of their previous manhood left. And there usually are.
Women have the freedom to dress as they like, cut their hair short or long, and to wear make-up or not. Women’s liberation has bought them their freedom. Men, on the other hand, are expected to be coarse and loud and act as if they are devoid of love, tenderness and compassion. They are forever on their guard against anything that could put their manhood in doubt.
The transgenderist has, through his earlier femme experiences, discovered freedom while playing in the feminine gender role and will move mountains to keep it. He knows only too well that such freedom will not come to all men in his lifetime.
We need a thorough study into the needs of the transgenderist. These include:
Hormone Therapy- As any good doctor knows, this should not be done without the strictest supervision. But since there are so many doctors with ‘moral’ objections, many TGs buy hormone tablets in the black market.
Beard Removal- Unfortunately most TGs can’t afford it. Most countries refuse to do the operation until beard removal is complete.
Breast Implants- Most transgenderists suffer extreme breast envy. It makes a feminine appearance much more convincing as hormone-induced breasts are not always sufficient.
Removal of the Testes- This often becomes necessary to stop the internal war between the natural male hormones and artificial female hormones. Removal of the testes allows the female hormones to do their work more efficiently and improves the feminine appearance dramatically.
Job Opportunities- Vital if the transgenderist is to survive financially. Most transgenderists are still qualified to do the jobs they did as males. But, owing to ignorance, he will probably be fired by his employer. Government workers are often forced to resign from their jobs.
The Americans have found, much to their surprise, that since they started helping men achiev ‘she-male’ status, the demand for complete sex change operations has dropped by 30%. Similar experiences have been found by some South African plastic surgeons. This is proof that there are more transgenderists than transexuals.
All that transgenderists are asking for is:
Freedom to live with our wives and families in peace The privilege of having a job and earning a living The right to be human andf have the same feelings and sentiments as other people. We too can be hurt Acknowledgement of our existence and a place in society so that we too can have happiness and peace
The transgenderist faces unique problems which should not be likened to those of the TS. There appears to be plenty of help and understanding for transsexuals but absolutely nothing for the transgenderist. In fact, many in the medical community do not even acknowledge their existence.
It seems to us that so long as the medical people insist on naming ‘sex’ as the motive for transgenderism, they will not begin to understand the condition. They must first understand that the condition is socially motivated.
Views expressed in this article are not necessarily those of Transformation.