Coming to Terms With Transvestism
By Terri Conroy
Unless you are fortunate enough to have the right stature and features, and can pass fairly easily when dressed and made-up as a female, it means the only outlet for us is the confines of our homes - we must not be found out, we would become outcasts.
Should we feel guilt or shame?
Providing what we do harms no other person, either physically or mentally, there should be no rational reason for feeling guilty. Neither should we feel ashamed of what we are, but unfortunately we feel ashamed of other peoples' perception of us.
If we have the courage to 'come out', as many do and eventually become if not totally accepted then tolerated, then our shame and guilt would disappear.
But this is the real world and unless you are fortunate enough to be able, physically, to pass as a woman then the stress and strain of continually being looked upon as a 'freak' may mean we have traded in one set of problems only to be confounded by another.
Coming Out
I am sure we all often feel the frustration of having to limit our activities to the confines of the home and would dearly love to 'come out' and damn the consequences. If only we could be found out and the decision made for us, life would be so much easier.
But beware, speaking from experience I can tell you that unless you intend to go all the way, being accidentally found out only compounds the problem and you can be left with the task of having to rebuild your life.
My advice to any of you having the courage to 'come out' is: do it sooner rather than later, it will never get easier.
Will it go away?
As stated earlier, I believe that transvestism is inborn and not the result of a childhood environment. or the fact that when you were a lad some nasty man put his hand down your trousers one night in the cinema.
I can look back to when I was about five or six years old and remember the fascination I had with young ladies and girls, which of course could be said to be quite normal (our sensuality is alive and well from a very early age). But I can see now that what I felt was different. I seemed to envy their femininity.
What must be appreciated is that although cross dressing is something from which we can derive great pleasure and release, once satisfied the urge returns in a relatively short space of time.
The major part of your life is dominated by this desire for femininity and I can assure you it does not go away.
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