The Admirable Transvestite
By JT Brien
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What is admirable about being a transvestite? Is the urge to dress in women's clothes something to be encouraged? Can wearing a dress somehow help to make a man a better person? These are the sort of questions that I, as a transvestite, have asked myself. Here, I hope, you will find the answers.
First let us define our terms. Not every man who puts on a frock is a transvestite. Female impersonators, drag artists and panto dames do not necessarily dress away from the stage. By a transvestite I mean a man who dresses for his own private enjoyment. In the full sense of the word, an amateur.
Why do we do it? It is not too difficult to accept that someone we love likes to dress up, but it is much harder to understand why. It is particularly difficult to understand that he may have been doing it in secret ever since he was a boy and, if he had not been found out, would have carried on doing it. Why all the secrecy if he is not ashamed of what he does?
The transvestites who come to public attention are those who have messed up their lives in some other way. They have become involved in crime or had mental breakdowns, or simply behaved incredibly stupidly. These are the only ones who get written about so it is easy, but quite wrong, to assume that all transvestites are the same, or that the habitual wearing of women's clothes will inevitably lead to the same fate. Even the transvestite who has not yet come to an understanding of himself and his passion, can harbour the same fears and with some justification.
The problem is that the man who feels guilty about dressing, and yet continues to dress, denies responsibility for his own actions. Because he cannot admit that he enjoys dressing he blames his upbringing, his hormones, his star sign, anything but himself. Small wonder that a man who becomes so confused about what he does by himself makes a mess of the rest of his life as well! If he then uses his dressing as an escape from that mess, and as an excuse for doing nothing about it, he is indeed a pitiable state. I know that state myself.
There have been times when I have been so obsessed by the thought of "becoming a woman" that I have done stupid things and hurt people needlessly, broken promises and failed to explore opportunities. I know from experience that obsession can make being a transvestite a nightmare. Transvestites are the most private of people. As well as those who are ridden by self-doubt and the fear of discovery, there are thousands of happy well-balanced men who dress as women either privately or in public about whom nobody knows, or those who do aren't saying.
The admirable transvestite is the one who has conquered his fear and obsession. He dresses only to give pleasure to himself and others. Of course his behaviour is odd and irrational and he does not talk about it to people who do not want to know. The same holds true of every sport, every hobby, and most jobs. Very little of what any human being does is absolutely rational and indispensable. The world is full of odd people behaving in odd ways and transvestites are by no means the oddest of the lot - a civilised society is one which can tolerate the eccentricities of its members where they do not curtail the freedoms of others.
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