Laura's Living Doll
By Petal Frances
On the eve of sharing Laura's house, I still hadn't told her. I must either abandon my feminine clothes, or reveal my transvestism. Gazing into the mirror, I rehearsed variations on my speech. It was almost time to go, and still I had come up with nothing satisfactory.
Crossing the bedroom, I opened my lingerie drawer. Slowly, lovingly, I ran my fingers over the satin. Parting with one lovely item from the drawer was no way to start my new life with Laura. We must begin in joy, with no lingering resentment occasioned by something I'd abandoned on her behalf.
Arriving at her house, I found Laura shifting her belongings to make room for mine. It was the sort of domestic task for which many women would have worn a sweatshirt and jeans. Laura had on a lovely green needlecord skirt and a blouse with applique decoration. I'd have enjoyed wearing her outfit.
"Laura," I began, determined to make my belated confession. "Can we sit down and talk...? There's something important..."
"Can it wait half an hour? I'd like to shift this stuff."
"I suppose it can. I'll give you a hand."
I helped her to carry the contents of several cupboards. The last box I moved contained a collection of fashion dolls. No doubt they included Barbie and Sindy, but there seemed to me more than two kinds of doll. Considering Laura's current wardrobe, almost anyone could have guessed that - as a girl- she'd played with such figures.
"Your old toys?" I asked unnecessarily.
"Yeah - I used to love dressing dolls. I still like clothes... Maybe you've noticed..."
"I certainly have. You always look a picture. Are you keeping the dolls? It'd be a pity not to."
"You bet I am. I wouldn't part with any of them. There are one or two rarities, as well. Do you recognise her?"
She handed me a dark haired doll. To judge from the style of her dress, she probably dated to the sixties. Thinking about it, I supposed that all of the dolls were that old. There were a lot of mini-skirts in the box.
"No... Should I?"
"She's supposed to be Emma Peel."
"The Avengers girl? I used to be in love with her."
"All that leather gear, perhaps. I tried to make her a real leather outfit, but it wasn't much of a success."
"Difficult to sew, I should think. Who's this? Julie Driscol? She has very short hair."
"No - I called her Pauline... it reminds me of something I wanted to speak to you about. Look- you wanted to sit down and talk. We've nearly finished here, we might as well have our say now."
"OK, why not?"
I tried to sound casual, but was very much the reverse. Perhaps Laura noticed my tension. She gave me a look I couldn't interpret. Then, turning, she led the way in to the sitting room, still clutching the short haired doll.
This was it. A few paces would bring me to the point of telling her. My mouth was dry, palms of the hands prickling. I was trying not to think about it.
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