The tale of the TV Detective
By Dianne Inche
It was apparent from Paula’s smile that interesting meant rather more than intriguing. In fact those photographs had changed her attitude towards Jerry entirely. Her conversation with Hannah had opened her eyes to an entirely different Jerry. One who was privately dainty, feminine and very, very exciting. A Jerry whom she wanted to meet and get to know, intimately.
Jerry groaned and began one of his tirades. Paula smiled and reached into her capacious bag. The silky, lacy confection she slowly drew out brought Jerry to a stop and his jaw fell.
“Where did you get that?”
“Well, in the course of my negotiations with Hannah it transpired she was getting bored with you. You’ve been a naughty girl, haven’t you? Not doing what Hannah wanted and refusing her. She was so fed up with you she couldn’t be bothered to threaten you any more. But she wanted the series to go on. “
“I won’t do another series. It’s ruining my love life. I’ve started to depend on wearing pretty knickers to, er, well, you know what.”
“There’s no need to worry.”
“I do worry. It’s turning me into....”
“Christine !” Paula’s tone demanded attention. “I’ve had enough of this whinging and whining. You will do at least one more series, otherwise I’ll use those pictures. And while we’re about it.” She tossed the silky confection of the teddy onto his lap.
“When I come to collect you this evening, you’ll be wearing that under.... Let me think. I know, change back into that leather trouser suit you’re wearing in the next scene and that blonde wig. And make sure you bathe and perhaps you could use this.” She produced a perfume bottle from her bag.
“It’s a new idea we’ve come up with. Christine Perfume. It’s sexy and we’re marketing with the line that if you smell sexy with it, then imagine how it comes out on a real woman. Imagine you’re testing it.”
Jerry had nearly recovered his composure when Paula smiled again.
“There are one or two of those photos that could put you in a very bad light and I would hate that to happen. But we can talk about at my place tonight.”
Jerry knew when he was beaten, but his blood ran cold as Paula, leaving the room, leaned back inside the door and whispered, “Oh and you’d better bring a nightie and a change of knickers. Alhough if you haven’t got anything you can borrow something of mine, can’t you? We don’t want you coming into work tomorrow without clean underwear.
“I’ll arrange to move your stuff to my apartment tomorrow and then we can sort out whether we need to go shopping. And, incidentally, I was at that last supermarket opening you did. It was the women who pinched you, or at least I did!”
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