Transformation Blog | Advice & Resources for Trans People

Nov 201520

Dream Date

---cdata-eal-admin--- short story

Dream Date

As soon as I left the bar last night, I knew that I was in trouble. Big trouble. As many times as I have worn a bra under my shirt, that was the first time that anyone had detected it, and I mean, ANYONE. It didn't seem as though I had any choice but to accept your invitation for a date. I would have risked immediate exposure if I hadn't. I knew that you wouldn't keep your mouth shut if I say no' to your invitation.' So, the first thing this morning, I call Sammy, the guy that runs the beauty shop two doors down from my apartment, and ask him if he could do me' late this afternoon. He knew what do me' meant. He had done me' just last Halloween before I went to a costume party, and he got such a thrill out of it, I was sure that he would do it again. (You see, one way Sammy gets his kicks is making beautiful females out of males. He really gets off on that. In fact, last Halloween, just as he was finishing, he DID get off, right there in front of me!) Sammy looked at his calendar and said his last appointment was at 3:00 this afternoon. He said he would close his shop, and for me to be there just after 3:00. I told him I would. He said, "Come in drag. I want you to run the risk of getting caught!" I told him no', I couldn't come out like that, but when he said he would not do me' if I didn't, I had to give in to him. I've spent almost this entire day getting ready for you. After I hung up the phone from talking with Sammy, the first thing I did was shave my entire body, except for my shoulder-length hair. When I finished shaving, I put Nair all over me to get rid of any stubble that might be left. I didn't think you would want your date to have any body hair showing any place. After I waited about 20 minutes for the Nair to work, I took a big, long bubble bath to make my hairless skin real soft for you. On completing my bath, I applied a real feminine-smelling body lotion to soften my skin even more. Then I polished my toenails and fingernails in a bright red, which would match my lipstick. Then, after much thought, I went and got the artificial breast forms. I didn't really want to wear them because of the pain that was caused when they were removed. I had only worn them once before, and I promised myself at that time that I would never put them on again. But, here I was, doing it anyway.

The breast forms were very special. About two years ago, I worked in a lab for a local hospital where there were experimenting on artificial skin, to be used for patients who had been scarred by burns. They had developed it to where you could not tell but what it was the patient's real skin. It was extremely thin, thinner that a piece of aluminum foil, and was as flexible as it could be. It had pores, so the real skin could still breathe and sweat in a normal manner. The only bad thing about it was that it was applied with a special cement which did not break down for about six months. Otherwise, you had to pull it off, which pulled on your own skin. After they developed the artificial skin, it was only a small step to combine that with breasts for patients who had undergone radical mastectomies. The one unit of skin and breasts ran all the way from the waist to the top of the shoulders, and all the way around the front half of the body. I had been given one of the prototypes by my boss as a souvenir of the project. Without him knowing it, I had taken some of the body cement so that I could actually use them. So I got the cement and the breasts and skin and laid down on the bed. I took the cement and painted my upper body from my waist to my shoulders, and then positioned the breasts over my nipples and smoothed out all of the skin, both below the breasts and up to my neck and shoulders. The breasts were really beautiful, a perfectly formed C' cup, with nipples that were constantly hard. It almost made me hard just to lie there and look at them while the cement was drying, which didn't take long. As I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror, I had the upper body of a beautiful female. Only my male organ, now sticking straight out, gave away my true sex. I tried to forget about it so it would go down. I went and got my black satin corset with the red piping around the top and the bottom. It had a quarter bra at the top which did nothing but push the breasts up and out, and it had eight garters at the bottom. Although it looked very soft and feminine, it was heavily boned and was made to literally shape the figure to an hour-glass form. It laced in the front and as I pulled the laces together, I could feel my body changing shape. My waist was being cinched in very tight, and the top and bottom of me was getting bigger.

When I got through with the lacing, my breasts were barely inside the quarter bra they had been pushed up and out so much, and I was really sticking out in the back, just like a sexy female. I sat down to put on my sheer black silk stockings which I was going to wear tonight, and as I fastened the eight garters, I could feel them tugging on my stockings all the way around. I slipped into some red leather sandals which had only two tiny straps across the toes, and a thin ankle strap in the back. The heels were only 3" high, but they were really spiked, and it was difficult for me to walk in them. (I had practiced a lot walking in the 5" heels that I would be wearing tonight, but hadn't worn these much at all.) There was so little support from the two tiny straps. It felt like I was walking on my tiptoes all the time. I went to the bathroom and teased and brushed out my shoulder-length hair. I pulled a little bit of hair down on my forehead to give me some bangs, and fluffed it all up real good to give me a feminine look. Then I pinned an artificial carnation on the side. I lined my lips with a bright red liner and filled in with a bright red wet-look lipstick. I clipped some red button earrings on each ear and put on a red bracelet. It was almost 3:00 o'clock so I slipped into a tight-fitting red silk blouse and buttoned it up the front. It was almost too tight because you could plainly see the outline of my nipples sticking out, but I thought Sammy would like that. I put on my panties, the sheer black bikinis that had the ties on the sides, and they really made me feel sexy. I just knew that you were going to be pleased with the way I would look tonight. I stepped into a black, straight skirt and zipped it up on the side. It was tight enough to show my behind sticking out, but not too tight to be uncomfortable. I grabbed a red leather shoulder bag, put my lipstick and money in it, and left for the beauty parlor. It felt funny walking down the hallway of the apartment building in those spindly high heels. I could barely tell that I had them on, they were so light, but I knew I was in heels because every once in a while, I would wobble a little as I took a step. As I got on the elevator, I almost tripped but I caught myself before I fell. The elevator was empty except for one lady and a little girl. As the elevator started down, the little girl tugged on the lady's skirt and said, "Mommie, mommie, I want you to polish my toenails like that lady has hers.", pointing to my feet. Her mother came back, "Sally, that's no lady. That's a man dressed up to look like a woman. Didn't you see that he tripped in those high heels as he was getting in the elevator? I guess he wants to be a female. It looks like he has gone to a lot of trouble to fool people. He won't fool very many though, until he learns how to walk better in high heels. He should have worn flats."

I was so humiliated that I could die. I wasn't 30 feet from my apartment and I had been made', by someone I didn't even know! They got out of the elevator a few floors down, and as she left, she said, "Sweetie, you be careful in those heels, or you will break one of those pretty legs, ok?" I was devastated by her last remark. My heart just fell. What if I did fall and hurt myself. Maybe I shouldn't go through with this. But then, I thought of the consequences if I didn't, and they would be far worse, so I continued. I was very careful as I stepped from the elevator and out on to the street. Thank goodness, there was nobody around, and I only had two buildings to cross to get to the beauty shop. When I got to the door, Sammy was waiting to let me in. He put the CLOSED' sign in the window and locked the door. Then, he escorted me back to the back. He complimented me on how well I looked, especially with the flower in my hair, and he noticed my figure too. I told him I was already dressed for tonight, except for my evening gown, shoes and purse. I would put those on when I got back to the apartment. He asked me to tell him specifically what I would be wearing tonight. He wanted to make sure that my hair and makeup complemented my dress. I told him that I would be wearing a black and white evening gown, black at the top and white from the waist down. He wanted to know exactly how it was made. I had to tell him that it was strapless, very low cut which would expose a lot of my breasts if I removed the little short, bolero cape I would be wearing over the top. I told him the skirt was rather provocative. It was straight and tight, and that it was split to the thighs in both the front and the back, making me have to stand all the time. If I sat down, it would fall away on both sides, exposing virtually all of my legs. I really felt naked when it did that. Like I had nothing on. And since the skirt was white, and I was wearing sheer black stockings, my legs would stand out even more against the white background. He wanted to know how low the top was cut, and I told him it just barely came up over my nipples. All the top of my breasts was exposed if I removed my jacket. He though that was real sexy, and said that I surely should remove my jacket during some part of the evening, just to give my date a thrill. I thought about what you would do when you saw my breasts exposed like that. It kind of made me shudder. With very little effort on your part, my gown could be slid down, exposing practically all of the breasts. The bra on the corset didn't cover much at all.

When we got to the back of the shop, he opened a door that led into a big private room. It was completely equipped with a chair, sink, hair dryer, etc. He asked me again, "Do you want the works' this afternoon?" I responded with a timid "Yes, please. I want to be as beautiful and seductive as I can for my date." Sammy said, "Well, you will have to do everything that I say. Are you ready to do that?" And I responded, "Yes, I guess so." With that, he asked me to take a seat in the chair. He went over to the wall and flipped a switch and turned and said, "Since you are getting the works', you will receive a video tape of the entire transformation. There is no extra charge for it. I do it every time I give the works'." And he came back over behind the chair. Before I knew what was happening, I felt a wide belt go around my waist and he was buckling it tight behind the chair. I asked him what that was for and he said, "You'll see. Just wait. Put your hands in the manicure molds." As I looked down at the arms of the chair, there were molds at the ends to separate the fingers and thumb. Not knowing what was going on, I spread the fingers on both hands and places them in the molds. Before I knew it, Sammy had placed a wide Velcro bands around my wrists and the arms of the chair, and pulled them tight. I didn't know what to say, so I just waited and didn't say anything. Sammy proceeded to put another Velcro binding on my arms just below my elbows. I was now securely bound to the chair with my arms and waist. I tried to move a little and couldn't move anything but my legs. It wasn't long before they were spread to the sides of the footrest and bound with more bands. Now I was totally helpless. Sammy reached over to the counter and got an aerosol can with his right hand, and then held my nose with his left hand. When I had to open my mouth to breathe, he sprayed something down the back of my throat. It had a cherry taste, and when I opened my mouth to tell him how good it tasted, my vocal cords would not work at all. He had paralyzed them. Not a sound would come out, no matter how hard I tried. Then he said, "Don't worry, honey. This will last only an hour or so. I just didn't want to hear you whining while I was working on you!" Then he turned the chair around and laid me back flat, as though he were going to wash my hair. He said, "I have some beautiful contact lens that you will wear in your eyes tonight. I used some just like them a couple of weeks ago on a guy that got the works' and his date thought they were fantastic. Don't worry about being blind. I will see that you get back to your apartment and get dressed on time."

He reached over to the counter and got a lens. It was extremely large for a contact, as big as my whole eyeball, and it had a picture of a beautiful, sensuous eye painted on the front side. On the back side, it was coal black. He pulled my lower right eyelid down and asked me to hold it there. Then he pulled the upper lid up and dropped the contact into my eye. I startled me a bit but it didn't hurt. He did the same thing with my left eye, and all of a sudden, I realized...I was BLIND! And it would look to anybody else that I was alert and wide awake. I couldn't see anything, not even a little light coming in around the edges. I wanted to scream but nothing came out. I couldn't say anything to stop him. All of a sudden, I began to feel real helpless..more like an object that a human being. I was bound to the chair and blinded by the contacts. I was there for him to use any way he liked. After he finished that, he called out, "OK, guys, you can come out now. He can't move and he can't see you. I have him bound to the chair and gagged with my special spray." I was shocked! Sammy had some guys hiding in the other room. What were they there for? What were they going to do? My mind was racing...I was almost in a panic! I heard them as they walked from the other room. One of them was definitely wearing high heels, real high heels, because I could hear short, mincing steps and the click of his heels on the tile floor. What was going to happen to me? I was breathing fast from the fear. About the time they reached the chair, Sammy said, "Honey, I would like for you to meet Bill and Bobbi, that's Bobbi with an i'. Since you can't see them, I'll describe them to you. "Bill is very tall, about 6'6" and weighs about 180 pounds. Bobbi is a little petite thing, probably not more that 5'6" counting the 6" spike heels shoes he is wearing. Bobbi is wearing a summer-weight mini dress that has pink and blue flowers on it. It has a full skirt and a tight-fitting bodice. He's wearing a black pearl necklace and bracelet with it, and it carrying a black clutch purse. He has on sheer nude stockings and his spike heels are hot pink leather pumps. Bill is wearing white slacks and a hot pink sport shirt with his white loafers. They are going to help me out by draining your balls. You must be totally empty when you have your date tonight, so you won't get any male' ideas. Now just relax and let them do their thing on you. You'll find that they are very good at sucking cock, both of them! Just sit there and let them empty you, do you hear?" I couldn't see a thing. I couldn't see what they looked like or anything. I just nodded my head to Sammy, or rather to where his voice was coming from. With that, Sammy raised the back of the chair to the upright position, but he left my legs sticking straight out. Then he said, "Go ahead boys, he's all yours...but don't go too fast. It's going to take me a while to pull all of his hair through the fine net of this wig. I don't want him cumming before I get through with that." And I felt a wig being fitted on my head.

Sammy said, "Honey, even though your hair is probably long enough, that mousey brown color just won't go with that black and white gown you are planning on wearing. This is a long black wig that I have put on you. It comes down to about the center of your back, just above your waist a little. I am going to take a knitting needle and pull your hair through the mesh in the wig, and then I will dye your hair and the wig coal black. That should really be pretty, don't you think?" I tried to say no' but nothing would come out, so I shook my head no' to tell him that I didn't want that done. I didn't want my hair dyed black. I wouldn't be able to go to work with it that way. When he saw me shake my head no', he said, "Well, Honey, it doesn't matter whether you want that or not, that's the way it's going to be!" And he poked the thin needle through the hair of the wig, then the mesh base, then twisted it and got a few of my real hairs and pulled them up through the wig. Then he went back through in almost the same place and did it again. And he kept doing that, just three or four hairs at a time. Meanwhile, I felt something else. A hand very lightly touched me on my right ankle and a big, booming bass voice said, "Bill, his legs are so beautiful, I'm getting hard just looking at them." And Bill said, "Yea, and I love those high heels he is wearing. They are so dainty I don't see how he could walk in them. And look at those beautiful bright red toenails. It makes me want to suck them, even with his shoes on." And Sammy said, "Go ahead, Bill, do anything that turns you on. He's not going to resist!" And with that, I felt a mouth on my left foot. He must have had my shoe in his mouth too. And he began to suck on my toes. Then I felt the hand on my right leg begin to slowly move up my leg toward my knee. And I felt the needle go in and get a few more strands of hair and pull them out. All of this together made my cock begin to stir in my panties. Bill kept sucking on my toes and Bobbi kept moving his hand slowly up my leg. When he got to the bottom of my skirt, he went underneath it and kept right on going. I wanted to scream out and say no, stop' but that was impossible. I tried to move to get away from that probing hand, but I was tied so tight that I couldn't move at all.

Bill said, "Bobbi, why don't you raise his skirt? Let's see what he has in his panties." And I felt my skirt being pulled up and the hem tucked into the waistband. I knew they had exposed my bare thighs above the tops of my stockings, and I could feel the cool air on my panties, and I began to get harder and harder. I couldn't stop myself. Then Bobbi, in his bass voice said, "Bill, look at those cute panties with the ties on the sides. Would you buy me some like that?" And he said, "Sure, Sweetie, as long as you let me suck that big cock of yours. I'll buy you anything you want. Why don't you undo the ties and let's see what kind of cock he has." And I felt some long fingernails fumbling with the ties on my panties. His fingernails must have been real long, because he couldn't seem to get a hold of the ties. Finally, Sammy reach down and said, "Here, let me help you with those. It's hard to do that with those 2" nails you have. I'll do it for you." In an instant, I felt the pressure from my panties was gone, and my cock popped out into the air. I know it must have been sticking straight up from the way it felt. When it did that, they all clapped and hollered, "Hooray, hooray. Would you look at that!" I was so embarrassed and humiliated that I would have died if I could. Bill quit sucking on my toe and started rubbing both hands up and down my nylon-covered legs, and the more he rubbed, the hotter I got. Right then, it didn't seem to matter that he was a man. I was hot. Then I felt a rough tongue on the tip of my cock, and it was flicking back and forth. I didn't know who it was. I wanted to move so bad. I wanted to tell them to stop. I couldn't do either. I just had to lay there and take it. Then Bill said, "Oh, Bobbi, I got a little pre-cum out of him just by flicking the head. Would you like a little taste of him?" And Bobbi said, "Yes, please kiss me, and kiss me deep. I want to see what he tastes like." Then everything stopped for a few seconds except the pulling of my hair through the wig. Sammy said, "Guys, are you going to do each other, or are you going to do him?" And Bill said, "OK, we'll do him first. Then we will do each other." With that, I felt my cock in somebody's mouth, all the way down their throat. My body shuddered when they started pulling their mouth away. I've never had such a thrill in my life. As quick as I was out in the open, their mouth closed on me again, only this time, it was another mouth. I didn't go as far in as the other one. Although I knew that I shouldn't cum with a guy sucking on me, I wanted to. I wanted to real bad.

But then they slowed down, and one would suck on me and then the other. I thought I would explode but every time I was on the edge, they would stop for a few seconds and just leave me suffering. This must have gone on for over a half hour, and then Sammy said, "OK, guys, one of you finish him off. I'm about done with pulling his hair through this wig. We need to get on with other things." I felt my cock go down somebody's throat, and this time it stayed there. They took their rough tongue and rubbed the underside of my cock without taking it out of their mouth. After about 30 seconds of this I exploded with the biggest orgasm I have ever had in my life, and they just kept sucking and sucking until my balls were absolutely empty. There wasn't one drop left in them. I wondered if I would be able to do half as good for you if you made me go down on you tonight. No sooner than they were through with me, Sammy said, "Sweetie, I'm now going to color your hair and give you a perm at the same time. Your hair is really beautiful as it is, but it needs just a little wave in it. That will make it look fantastic. The perm has an ebony black dye in it. Unfortunately, I don't have any rinse-out color in black so I will have to use this one. You'll just have to get used to having black hair from now on." Then, I could feel him start to put big rollers in my hair. When he had all of them in, I could smell that awful perm solution being put all over my scalp. While the color and perm were setting, he said, "While that sets, I'll pierce your ears...no, I'll double pierce your ears. That will make you look really sexy!" In no time, I could feel something cold on my right ear. Then a snapping sound, like a staple gun. But I didn't feel anything. The thing was moved a little and then another snap. He was literally ruining me with this make over'. I wouldn't be able to go back to work on Monday. I couldn't take holes out of my ears!

When he finished with my makeup, he assisted me out of the chair and said he would walk me back to the apartment. It was eerie, trying to walk in those high heels and not being able to see where I was going. I thought I was going to fall down all the time. He walked me around the shop for a little for me to get used to being on his arm. Then I heard him open the door and we went out on the sidewalk. I could feel the difference in walking on the concrete and walking on the tile floor in his shop. In what seemed like forever, we made it to my apartment building. Thank goodness there were no steps for me to have to climb. But Sammy did tell me when to step over the elevator opening so I would not hang a heel in the crack. As we rode up the elevator, a male voice said, "My, Dear, your hair is just beautiful!" Sammy nudged me a little to indicate that comment was for me, so I turned my head toward the sound of his voice and in said, in a whisper, "Thank you." And he said, "And those big, blue eyes of yours are just gorgeous" to which I repeated my thanks, bowing my head to make him think that I was very shy. If he only knew I couldn't see anything but pitch black, he would be shocked. This was really weird. As we got out of the elevator and were walking down the hall, he called out, "And those beautiful red high heels really make your ankles look nice." I could have gone through the floor with embarrassment. Sammy asked for my apartment number and I told him 611, and fumbled in my purse for the key. As he unlocked the door and we went in, he said, "Gosh, it's almost 7:00 o'clock. I had better get you dressed, and fast. With that he unbuttoned my blouse and took it off. He couldn't resist touching my breasts, and I couldn't say a thing. He removed my skirt and I could feel the air blowing over my body, standing there in my undies and high heels. He had me sit on the bed and I could feel him taking off my shoes. Then I felt him putting on my evening shoes, those black patent pumps with the 5" spiked heels. Sammy said, "You can't go out tonight with your cock flapping around in your panties like that. I'll fix it up real nice for you, and I guarantee that you won't have to worry about it. I have this 1/4" wide pink ribbon. All we have to do is to tie it real tight around the head of your cock and then pull your cock down and backwards and cement the ribbon to you buttocks. We can't bring it up through your crack, because your date might want to get into that virgin backside tonight and play around." Then he stood me up and put on the bodice of my evening gown. It was really tight, I could just feel that I was sticking out over the top. He patted the tops of my breasts and said, "Those are just about the nicest tits that I have seen in a long time. Your date should really enjoy them."

Then Sammy said, "I have some earrings here at work that I will loan you to wear tonight, Dear. They will really be pretty with your outfit. We will use these small sterling silver balls in the upper holes, and I have some beautiful, silver Christmas trees for the lower holes. You won't even feel the little balls at the top, but the trees' may be a little uncomfortable until you get used to them. They are quite long and heavy, but I'm sure that your date will really get turned on by them. They are like little 5" trees with a trunk and branches, hanging down from your ears, On each of the branches, there one to four tiny silver bells, which will actually ring when you move your head. I'm sure they will attract attention. They have every time they have been worn." And then I could feel him put the little balls in the holes he had made in my ears. And when he put the trees' on me, I could really feel them. They were really heavy, and I would be consciously aware that I was wearing earrings all the time! And the little bells would tinkle every time I moved my head the least little bit. Sammy came around to the front of the chair and started working on my hands which were tightly bound to the manicure molds. He said, "Honey, we're going to have to remove your nail polish. I have some beautiful 2" artificial high fashion nails which will make your hands look much better." And I felt a cold liquid on my fingers, removing the polish that I had taken so long to put on. Then he said, "Sorry, Sweetie, but I don't have any of the regular fingernail cement. I will have to put these on with industrial strength cement. They will stay much better with that anyway, except you won't be able to remove them for several months." I was literally being ruined. I had a wig that I couldn't get off, breast forms that would be very painful to remove, and now artificial nails that were permanent. What was he doing to me? I could feel him cement each nail over my own nail, but I couldn't tell any difference, at least not then with my hands and arms bound to the chair the way they were. When he was finished with my new nails, he laid me back in the chair and I and heard the water running. He took the rollers out and rinsed out my hair and raised my chair and put me under the hair dryer. When I finished drying, he started doing my makeup. He moved me over to a makeup mirror where he start to transform my face into that of a beautiful female. He said, "Your face will be beautifully made up, almost lacquered like a Japanese doll, with silvery eye shadow, a dull reddish rose blusher, and pancake with powder to match your tannish complexion. Long false eyelashes complete the picture, along with your normal eyebrows. Your lips will be painted a glossy red. You will be exotically beautiful."

Then he had me put a hand on his shoulder to keep my balance while I stepped into the skirt of the gown. I could feel it being tightly fastened around my waist, but I could also feel the air on my legs and know that they were sticking out through the slits. I tried to put my feet together so it would cover my legs, but it was difficult to stand in that position for very long. I could feel him pull the white, elbow-length gloves up on my arms, and could feel my fingertips open to the air. He slipped a strand of black pearls around my neck and a black pearl bracelet on my left wrist, over my glove. To finish up, he slipped the short, bolero cape around my shoulders and buttoned the one button to hold it on. He handed me my small, silver clutch purse, to complete my transformation. He said I was to carry that with me at all times, wherever I went. Just as he finished, the doorbell rang and Sammy went to the door. He opened it, and invited you in. He introduced himself and told you he was the one responsible for the transformation. He told you that I was blind, but if you wanted me to be able to see, all he had to do was remove my contact lenses. He also told you about my lack of voice, and gave you a little atomizer tube you could use to neutralize the chemical that had paralyzed my vocal cords. Then he said good-bye and left, closing the door behind him. And here we are together, all alone..just the two of us. I hope you will be tender with me.

Nov 201520

Gwen's First Support Group Meeting

---cdata-eal-admin--- short story

Greetings all, I've just read Robyn's story of her first time out. I think all of us remember our first time. The very first TS/TV/CD Support Group meeting I went to, I must admit to being petrified! I was so new at all of this that I didn't even have a wig! I had purchased a nice 2 piece outfit and a pair of new heels to go with it. Prior to leaving the house, I spent almost an hour doing my face and and another half hour doing my nails. It is a one and a half hour drive to the meeting site. The site is held in a Hotel/Motel usually quite busy with 'regular' patrons. The entire trip was nerve wracking to say the least. I was constantly on the lookout for any patrolman and monitored my speed. Perspiring (or is it glowing!) I arrived early and sat in my car and waited. And waited. And waited. During this nail biting time, my heart was trying to pound it's way out of my chest, my mouth was dry and I kept running all kinds of scenarios through my head. There were a constant stream of people walking by - some stared, some were too caught up in what they were doing to pay any attention. Finally, after seeing one of my 'sisters' enter, I got out and with knees weak with apprehension, I clicked across the public parking lot sans wig, made it up the stairs without tripping and took a deep breath and knocked on the door. I didn't know what to expect. Being as scared as I was, I ran hundreds of disastrous scenarios through my mind. They would laugh. I would be rejected. The list goes on and on. Then the door opened. That moment changed my life. With a great deal of cordiality, I was invited in. The lady that I had seen walk in told me to 'come on in honey and relax as we are all human' in here. I almost burst into tears. I was greeted by more warmth and friendship than I ever thought possible. There were M2Fs, F2Ms, CDs, TVs, TS (pre & post op) and 2 Significant Others gathered in small groups. During the couple of hours of the meeting, every single person made it a point to come up to me and introduce themselves. They all welcomed me and not one person said anything about the nonexistent wig. I was euphoric. I felt that for the first time in my life that I was accepted. Accepted for who I was, not what I was. These people have all tread the same path as I and the camaraderie was unbelievable. Having had no one to turn to for any kind of assistance, I suddenly found myself in a room full! One lady had a spare wig in her car and made the trip, through the public area to retrieve it. She gave it to me. She told me that I was welcome to join them after the meeting for some libations at a club that catered to the GLBT community. Not wanting to be pulled over and have to explain my outfit to a patrolman, I went real easy on the sauce. But the sheer acceptance was more intoxicating than what I had to drink. In the years since, I have made every meeting possible. But, I will never forget that day. It has turned my life around. Yes, problems still exist, but with friends like this, talking them out is easy and we all share each others ups and downs. I hope that someone who is dithering about joining a support group would take the plunge. Yes, it may not be all goodness and light, but the chances are that you will find acceptance and friendship. Please, at least give it a thought. Hugs and kisses, Gwen9960@aol.com

Nov 201520

Jenna's Story - A Crossdressing Story

Administrator short story

Cross dressing has become a big part of my life and like others I would like to share my experiences and views, if you decide to post my article…”

Ok, so this is my story…

It is not one racked with with emotional turmoil, it probably wouldn’t even make a Mills and Boon novel. It is not one of a man’s desire to become a woman when he realises that he should have been born a girl.

But the interest being a TV has created to the general public and indeed to the unique individuals who visit the Transformation site, made me want to put fingers to keyboard (so to speak) and share my cross dressing experiences and views with you.

As I write this article, I do so as Jenna, my female alter ego. I am dressed as her, in lacey underwear, high heels and a short skirt with a bosom-hugging top to add to the air of occasion.

I am 31 now and have been cross dressing since the tender age of 6 or 7, or indeed as far back as I can remember. To be honest, I don’t know why I began cross dressing, but having an elder sister probably helped and may have been a starting point.

At that age, I cannot put it down to hormonal imbalances, or even starting to think to myself that I wish I had been born a girl, it was something that happened one day and has been a part of my life ever since. Looking back now, there still doesn’t appear to be a reason, but even to this day, I now have the urge to slip into my lacey underwear and my own female clothes and become Jenna whenever I can. My reasons are simple: female clothing is a damn sight prettier than my own, I love to wear it, I feel good when I am wearing it.

Why did I choose Jenna?

A couple of reasons really. Firstly, it is unusual (a bit like me I suppose) and secondly, it is quite a girly name which befits the way I feel when I cross dress.

I had never really thought of giving myself a female name or personna before, that was until I met a lass at a party, who was a transsexual. She listened to me and suggested my giving myself a girls name and it went on from there.

Throughout my life, there have been several occasions when the opportunity to dress as a woman, and actually go out in my party frock dressed up to the nines, have presented themselves. They were mainly confined to fancy dress parties, or pub and club nights, but even to this day I am still very much in the closet and have never met anyone in real life who feels the same way as me and understands why I and many others cross dress.

Speaking to someone by email is not the same as meeting someone face to face. When you can both sit down together, you can at least both dress as women and swap experiences.

The clothes I wear are my interpretation of how I think a woman should look, as indeed is many other TVs’ perceptions. I love sexy, lacey underwear. I love wearing figure hugging skirts, tops or dresses finished of with a set of perfect legs and of course, the good old high heel shoe. I own a pair with a 4 inch heels and I wear them as often as I can, because I think they look really feminine and I look good in them.

I think I dress the way I do because I am very envious of how many sexy women there are in this world, and as well as wanting to be able to pass convincingly as one of them, I would prefer to share my bed with one as well. Kind of have my cake and eat it.

They have so many beautiful things — what do men have? A chauvanist attitude and a dull, grey suit…

I feel great when I am dressed as my alter ego and it also helps in de-stressing me at the end of another crap day at the office. I have to keep my feelings and wanton desires well in the closet when I am at work, as well as at home as the wife refuses to accept that I am TV and life could become very unbearable.

Going back to dressing as a woman: my feelings can sometimes be really overwhelming. I enjoy dressing in petite feminine things (I am a slim size ten by the way). I even used to bunk off school in my teenage years, just so that I could rifle through my sister’s clothes and spend the day pampering myself as every woman does now and again.

I buy my own clothes, the knowing look of the spotty faced Saturday girls are always a bit disconcerting… can they actually sense that you may have an ulterior motive for that bag full of sale priced clothing you have just purchased? One would certainly think so. Why does it always seem to take so long for the items to be put through the tills, accompanied by the girly titters and giggles. Embarrasing as it may be, as long as you look good and feel comfortable in that nice sexy little outfit you have just purchased, who cares?

Which brings me nicely onto my next point:

..that of the narrow minded views and opinions of the good old public… I can’t discriminate, but it really annoys the hell out of me when you get the big mouthed idiot or the unsavoury characters shall we say, who make life unbearable for each of us, each TV – a unique person in my own opinion.

Yes, it isn’t the done thing for a man to dress in women’s clothing. It could be misconstrued as being abnormal, but what the hell. You can only take so much abuse, but the narrow minded views of individuals who think that just because you are TV you must be perverted push the limits. Is it any wonder that most TVs remain in the closet?

Underneath the mascara and lipstick there is still a man, and I am pretty sure that most people will only take so much before they explode, myself included.

Some women actually actively encourage their partner’s cross dressing. They feel that if they help their menfolk to become women, not only do they gain a confidente, a sister, a good female friend, they also gain the respect, love and admiration only a part-time woman can bring.

Most feel threatened though, God knows why.

Personally speaking, I have no desire whatsoever of becoming a full time woman. Not taking away the respect I give to those who have made such a huge emotional decision, it certainly takes guts. I have a friend who is in the final throes of their transition to full time womanhood.

I admire and respect her, but at the same time I pity her because of what women face. There is no doubt that they are, probably, the weaker sex in some respects. They are used and abused in a very male-dominated world and more often than not taken for granted, something of which I too am guilty at times.

So where does that leave me? Still in the closet I’m afraid, unless by some freak act of nature I turn into a female overnight or the world actually realises that TVs do exist but underneath our lipstick and mascara we are human too.

I would love to wear my lacey underwear under my clothes, but I can’t, I have to remain behind closed doors. Perhaps Jenna might come to fruition one day and people will understand.

I am a normal person, I just enjoy dressing as a woman.

Take Care One and All

Regards, Jenna

Nov 201520

Zoes's Trans Woman Story

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Zoes's Trans Woman Story

The story begins in what I think was 1970, which would make me about 6 years old. There was another boy in my class at school whose parents weren't very well off, and one morning he didn't have any trousers to wear for school. What exactly can this have to do with the story, I can hear you asking? Well, as I said, this is where my story began (or maybe before as the thoughts were already there), but this poor young child had to come to school in a pair of his sisters green woollen tights (you know the kind, the ones that little girls wear), and all I was thinking was that I wish my mum would send me to school in a pair of those tights too, and a skirt and blouse like all the other young girls were wearing. There was a girl in my class called Helen - she was very pretty and had long fair hair, in which she always wore ribbons or a hair band. I used to go to sleep at night after saying a prayer that while I was asleep, could God please make me look like Helen, as I really wanted to be a girl and didn't feel right being a boy. It wasn't a sexual thing then, I can't really put my finger on what exactly it was, but I knew that I really should be a girl. I can then remember going shopping with my mum in the high street, and she called in a local shop to collect some wool. The lady behind the counter began a conversation with her, and as I looked at her I began to notice her breasts - and please remember that in those days bras weren't as shapely as they are today, they were sort of pointed and very rigid looking. I asked my mum if I would have busters like the lady's behind the counter when I got older. She was very embarrassed as you can imagine, and we made a very quick exit from the shop. Things were forgotten for quite a while, I suppose until I reached puberty, and I was at comprehensive school. There was a girl in some of my classes called Jane - nothing stunning, in fact she was probably very ordinary - but all I wanted was to be like her, long white socks, grey skirt, white blouse, and grey school jumper. I would go home from school and unroll long lengths of toilet tissue, roll it up in to balls and put it down my jumper. I would then put on one of mums grey skirts and a pair of her shoes - it felt nearly right, but it would never be right for me as perfection is all that I wanted, and if I couldn't be a girl it wasn't good enough. It wasn't long after this that we went to a party at an aunts and my cousin, a girl who was quite a bit older than me, was talking with her brother about something (I cant remember what), but she said something which made me sit up and listen. What did she say I hear you ask? Well it was something to do with a friend and a sex change. It was said in fun and this friend didn't really want a sex change, but it was the first time I had heard about such a thing, and I thought "they don't really mean that you could actually change sex do they?". I carried on all through school dressing up, and then started to go out with girls but sex wasn't right, something was missing. When I was seventeen I met this girl and went steady for quite a while just to fit in (my brother had a steady girlfriend and I wanted to look normal), but when having sex we used to try different positions and one of these was to get her to lie on her back on top of me and I could run my hand down to her vagina and imagine that it was really mine. I would caress her breasts and imagine what it would be like to really grow a pair. Of course I already know what it is like to have sex as a girl, how it feels, the emotions, the excitement and everything - I can't explain this, it is something which I just knew. About a year after this I met another girl. We moved in with each other and it was bliss; all the clothes I could possibly want to play with when she was at work. I was very slim then and could just squeeze in to a size ten. I would put make-up on and for a day I was a girl. After a year we split up, and I went back to live with my parents - for quite a few years cross dressing didn't happen, and on the outside I was again what people would call normal. When I met my wife things just began again. It's impossible to suppress the urge to dress as a girl because it's the right and normal thing to do, because deep down I think that really I should be a girl. At 36, fat and balding though, I don't think that this will ever be. Some days you get depressed, and of course the feeling never goes away and never will. I have considered leaving my wife and beginning a new life as Zoë, full time, but can't make the break. I just want to disappear and go somewhere where I can be with other people like myself, to share the real me with people who don't run a mile or call you a weirdo, queer and the like. Of course this hasn’t happened to me as I am still in the closet (and you don't meet many people in your bedroom closet do you?). I really want to grow breasts, but as a Changeaway Assistant pointed out to me, my wife would be wondering what the hell was going on if her husband suddenly started to grow breasts. This is the story so far, in brief, and is still going on. Zoë

Nov 201520

Click and Collect

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Click and Collect

UK customers can order goods online and have there order delivered to our Transformation Manchester shop for collection with our click and collect service. This Free service is available during trading hours Monday to Saturday( exclude all Bank Holidays). There is no charge for this service.

Nov 201520

Cash On Delivery Service

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Cash on Delivery Service

The "Cash on Delivery" service is now available in all E.U countries (European Union Countries). We use U.P.S, the worlds largest international package delivery company and Global Leader in time-definite scheduled delivery services, to confidentially deliver your order to your chosen address and collect payment from you in your local currency. This is a free service if you live in any of the EU European Union Countries ( excludes UK*) You may choose from our Priority delivery service, which can take as little as 2 days ( max 4) or our next Day Express Service. See below for full details of our delivery charges.

Option 1 20€

Priority 2-4 days delivered by UPS to these EU member countries: Ireland, Belgium, Germany, France, Austria, Luxembourg, Holland, Spain, Denmark, Finland, Italy and Sweden.

Option 2 - 35€

Priority 2-5 days delivered by UPS to ALL other members of EU-EUROPEAN UNION countries not listed in option 1.

Option 3 - 45€

Express Next day delivered by UPS to these EU member countries: Ireland, Belgium, Germany, France, Austria, Luxembourg, Holland, Spain, Denmark, Finland, Italy and Sweden.

Option 4 - 65€

Express Next day delivered by UPS to ALL other members of EU-EUROPEAN UNION countries not listed in option 3. For more details feel free to contact our customer service line on +44 161 773 4477 or email us Please note if your total order value is 150€ or less you will be charged an extra 20€ for the Cash On Delivery service. Unfortunately no carrier/postal service offers Cash on Delivery to the U.K and U.S.A

Nov 201520

Discreet Delivery Plain Packaging

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Discreet Delivery Plain Packaging

Parcels are sent discreetly. All goods are securely wrapped in plain packaging with no indication of the actual products enclosed. All orders are despatched within 2 working days We use both UPS or Royal Mail to deliver to you. You can also insure your goods in transit for a small fee

Nov 201520

First Steps Out - A Dressing Story

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Dressing

Almost all crossdressers start by dressing in the complete privacy of their own homes. Many are happy to stay that way, but others want to venture further afield, stepping out into the wide world of everyday life. That first outing can be a terrifying, but exhilarating, experience. Are you going to be read, and if so, what could the result be? Where should you go, and what should you do? The Groundwork Your very first time cross-dressed in a normal, everyday environment will be like no other, and once you have done it successfully you will have the courage to do it again and again. It will open up a completely new world. For this reason it is worth going to special lengths to make sure your dream doesn't turn into a nightmare. You will have enough to worry about without getting lost. 1. Plan out where you are going to go, how you are going to get there, and how you are going to get back. Going Out In Daylight... Fledgling TVs often making the mistake of choosing places where there are few people around, while in fact there is more safety in numbers. You are less likely to cause attention in a busy shopping street than in a quiet park, where mothers with children could misunderstand your motives. If your first outing is to be in daylight, head if you can to a city centre and choose the more affluent shopping areas. Here you are more likely to be amongst people who are too polite to mention your appearance even if they spot something amiss. Avoid areas that are frequented by gangs of bored teenagers looking for something to do - or someone to jeer at. It's well worth rehearsing your trip before you make it. Going by car, if you have one, is obviously favourite as buses and trains can add to the strain, but if you have to go by public transport find out the times so you're not stranded for 20 minutes in the rain. This can play havoc with your wig, your make-up and your nerves. Unless you want to chat with a car park attendant, go for pay and display or an automatic multi- storey. Its worth queuing for the right spot and never take any risks with parking - you won't be the first transvestite to have to go to the car pound to pay the towing-away charge, but believe me, it's not fun. Parking is obviously easier in small towns, but here you run greater risks of embarrassment. Seasoned TVs might get a buzz out of shocking Chipping Sudbury, but provincial policeman may take more notice of you than the city forces who have seen it all. ...Or After Dark Some TVs I know just enjoy driving around in their cars, but this just seems an extension of the closet. If you are going out, you want to head somewhere and do something. But what? Whatever you do, don't hit your neighbourhood streets for a stroll at two o' clock in the morning. This may be tempting, you're all dressed up and it's just out there, but it really is the silliest plan of all. If you look good, patrolling policeman are going to wonder what a woman is doing out alone at that time of night. Passable at first first glance, you could be still be done for soliciting. There are various transvestite groups who meet here and there about the country, in venues ranging from someone's front room to the upstairs of a gay pub, but again it very much depends on where you live. However most large towns nowadays have a gay pub or club, somewhere. It's well worth sussing out the local scene first, as a man, to see how the land lies.

Transgender Resources...Into The World As A Woman, By Annie Clarke 2. If you want to pass successfully as a woman, make sure you look the part Making Up... When you're dressing up in your dimly lit bedroom, it's easy to think that the more make-up you apply, the greater the transformation. Inch thick panstick, bright blue eye-shadow and a wide swathe of red lipstick and Bob's yer Auntie, you're away. You might look like your own perfect little fantasy in the mirror, but on the street you'll appear ridiculous. Dress as other women will be doing around you. Wear light make-up during the day, but always enough to cover your beard shadow, and you can afford to go heavier on the eyes at night. Your make-up is all-important. It takes practice to get it right and it's always worth getting a second opinion. You will get good advice and help from the girls at Transformation shops nationwide. Choosing Your Outfit Do try to blend in with your surroundings, unless outright exhibitionism is really your game. If the average woman in Debenhams wore a tight pvc mini skirt and six inch heels, you could as well. But they don't. Dress your age. You can be chic as you like, but a middle-age woman tarted up as a teenager attracts sniggering without the added incentive that she is also a man. Remember, the mast majority of people won't even notice you unless you're of an unusually large build. Those that do will seldom give you a second glance if there is nothing that particulary strikes their eye. 3. Things to avoid Ladies loos - the one place you really are risking trouble if you're read. You'll get away with it in gay pubs, but the best advice is to avoid them whenever possible. Breaking the law - don't drink and drive, or do anything which could bring you into conflict with the police. If you behave yourself, you should have no problem at all from the boys in blue, and especially their female colleagues. Don't give them any reason for taking you down to the station, because there you could find their liberal attitude is just skin deep. Kids - Children are the worst challenge you will face. Young ones lack their parents' social inhibitions and can call a spade a spade, or in your case, a man a man. Their parents will also be in protective mode, and could over-react to a "pervert" being near their kids. Places like McDonalds are not recommended. Older children, especially in gangs, are even worse and can easily take it upon themselves to follow you for something to do. A TV aquaintance of mine recently had to seek help from a policeman because a pack of 15 year olds chased him through Manchester's Arndale Centre on a saturday afternoon. It does happen, and he always thought he was totally convincing. Acting like a man - remember you're a lady, and don't let your inner masculine self dominate your commonsense. Ladies don't walk the street at night on their own, and may be thankful if a police car stops and asks them if they O.K.. You won't be so glad of it. Ladies on their own may eat in restaurants or drink in bars nowadays, but they are still few and far between and are likely to attract unwelcome attention. Unless you want to be chatted up by amorous waiters, stick to the gay areas of town for eating and drinking if you can. Above all - take care and you should enjoy yourself. Once you have done it once, and felt the breeze waft your skirts, you'll want to do it again. It's a free country and why shouldn't you - so long as you don't upset other people, they shouldn't trouble you. The rest is all down to confidence, which only experience will bring. Go for it, and have fun!

Nov 201520

Stephanie's Advice

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STEPHANIE'S ADVICE

Our transsexual founder Stephanie Anne Lloyd is here to help you with any questions you have on any topic. I would like to be a woman with breasts and I want to make the right decision on what is the right product or is breast implants the best option. Stephanie says "Implants require an expensive operation and will never feel as real as those that you grow yourself. To develop your own breasts you will need to take oestrogen female hormones (wide choice available at transformation.co.uk remember the stronger the formulation the faster enlargement will be) and an anti-androgen which will lower the level of the male hormone, testosterone circulating in your body allowing oestrogen to act more effectively. Dependant on your budget, age and health we can provide free advice as to which products would be the most suitable for you" How can I convince myself cross dressing is not wrong? I sometimes feel so bad and so guilty, I am married you see! John from Cambridge Stephanie says Stop beating yourself up John. I can assure you it is not wrong, nor is it illegal. You are in very good company with your hobby. Men from top professional positions right through to unemployed people enjoy this interest. Most are married, all different age groups, shapes and sizes. Nobody knows why some men dress, some men do not. The medical profession do not even know. If only people generally could be educated to realise just how harmless cross dressing is! It does not mean you are about to change your sexuality. You have to realise this is natural and a necessity for your wellbeing. It does not go away if you ignore how you feel, or do not make provision to explore your need (discreetly), you will feel irritable, frustrated and fed up. Ignoring your need could even make you depressed. I am sure your wife would prefer a happy contented man. So no regrets, dress discreetly and enjoy exploring your femininity. I take a 'man' size 10 shoe. What size will I need in a ladies size? I have been tempted to buy them mail order, but I guess it is better if I can try them on first. Can I try them on in a Transformation shop? Barry from Wigan Stephanie says Yes! Of course Barry. Transformation stocks shoes up to a size 12 and they are wider in fitting and stronger than those found in high street stores. Wearing high heeled shoes pushes the body weight forward, so you will probably need a size larger than normal, in your case a size 11. Most people have one foot slightly larger than the other and you can compensate for this by wearing an insole sock in the looser shoe. Transformation stocks classic lines in the main shoes and boots to go with every outfit, whether it is worn indoors or outdoors. They also stock very reasonable priced thigh length PVC boots for that special occasion. Can I sleep in my Silicone Breasts? Mike from Newcastle

Stephanie says

No, they are not meant for great pressure to be applied. It will only flatten them, which you certainly do not want to happen. ‘Rubberised’ ones which will give you the shape in a nightie and are more 'robust'. Transformation have ideal breasts priced at £59.99 or £69.99. Ring any shop branch or CSD to order, or place an order on the internet. My wife found out I dressed, was furious and has given me a hard time ever since. I have promised to give it up and told her I would be having 'aversion' therapy to cure me, is it possible to be cured. Maggie from Stockport

Stephanie says

Maggie you cannot be 'cured' because there is nothing wrong with you. Life might be simpler if you did not dress, but let me tell you that you are in very good company. Thousands of men from all walks of life dress. Nobody can say why some men do and some men do not. However it’s a natural part of who and what you are. The feelings go away, but can be 'managed' so that you don't have this feeling of vulnerability and or trapped obsession. You cannot give it up but you can fit it into your life, so that you don’t hurt or upset those close who perhaps don’t understand how harmless dressing is. Anyway why give up something which you enjoy and is necessary to you. Why don't you speak to someone at Transformation who can talk to you about 'changeaway'. A 'changeaway' would be the ideal solution, relaxing 'en femme' in a safe confidential place where you needn't worry about the telephone or someone arriving unexpectedly. What do women really think about men who Cross-Dress? Terry from Leicester

Stephanie says

I guess you could say opinions are divided on the matter. Some women are broadminded, find it fun and actively encourage their partner to do it (yes I know it’s every TV's dream). Other women would not want to know, because they assume (wrongly) it diminishes a man's masculinity. Stay on the side of caution when it comes to telling a partner. Remember you’re not doing anything wrong, illegal or immoral, but you could jeopardise a good relationship. Don't forget 'Transformation' shops exists for guys who have to be discreet! My wife recently got to know I Cross-Dress, when she came back from work early. She does not seem to mind, after the initial shock, but I am keen to proceed without upsetting her unduly. What would you suggest? Tony from Plymouth

Stephanie says

You are being very sensitive to her feelings Tony which is nice and I would always proceed with 'caution'. Sometimes ladies do an 'about turn' after first seeming not too mind. I think the secret is to not appear too obsessed, not too talk about it too much and not seem over keen to spend lots of money on your 'new wardrobe', The main problem will arise with wives when they think their husbands female alter ego is taking over and it becomes competitive. Remember she married a bloke and she wants to have that way. It such a relief for you to not feel you have a dark secret and that must make you feel a lot more relaxed and a nicer person to live with. Stephanie, I would like to order good through your shops on Customer Services, as I cannot get in to visit the shops easily as I live in Cumbria. However I am very worried about my Mother finding out that I dress. Would the packaging indicate where the items have come from? It is really scary to think she would find out. Ron from Cumbria

Stephanie says

Ron, everything that Transformation sends out to Transformation customers is packaged in plain packaging, just with your name and address on the front. There would be no indication where the item had come from. Also we can send it next day special delivery for you, this would have to be signed for by you personally, therefore it would be you who personally receives the parcel. Also just to put your mind at rest any payment through credit card will only show on your statement as SERCUS Ltd and not Transformation. Transformation as a company are very focused on keeping everything discreet and confidential. You can also set up a post box at your local main Post Office, so do enquire. I am 76 years of age. I feel a bit of an old fool asking this, but am I too old to come into one of your shops for a 'Transformation'? I have always had a very strong urge to do this, I do not know why! Sadly my wife died recently and now, on my own, I do not feel as though I would be letting her down, what do you think? I read your column regularly and always think you offer very good advice. Tommy from Blackburn

Stephanie says

Tommy you are certainly not too old. I have dealt with a customer of 92 years! We can't make you look 18 again, but we can make you look a very attractive mature lady. Trust me! We can! You have suppressed your feminine side for too long, although I quite understand why. Now is the time to take action. Pop into our Manchester Shop to experience the high standard of customer service and allow the staff to work their magic. It will be a delightful experience, one to treasure! Give the shop a ring first for more re-assurance, just do it! My Husband came home from the pub recently and disclosed that he wanted to Cross-Dress, I was horrified at first, but I do love him and want to try and understand. I found your website, which was a great relief as it looks so professional and respectable. Can I ask you Stephanie, does he want to do this because I'm not women enough for him? This has made me feel really inadequate. Gemma from Stockport

Stephanie says

This is nothing to do with you or what you have or have not done. I can assure you of that! He probably finds you very attractive and wants to emulate you! Some men dress, some men do not and nobody knows why. Dressing does not emasculate your fella and is often not sexually motivated. We all have a mixture of masculine/feminine qualities. He is probably kind, caring and sensitive. Enjoy those qualities, remember he is doing nothing illegal or immoral. Some women know about their man dressing but don't want to witness it, others can accept it. If it's controlled! Perhaps you could set 'boundaries' of times when dressing is acceptable to you and when its not. You may decide it’s not appropriate in front of you. Take it slowly and keep the lines of communication open. He will feel tremendous relief that you 'know' and hopefully his now 'shared secret' will pull you together even more. Good luck! My youngest daughter, Clare came home from school early unexpected. I was fully dressed, wearing my wife's clothes. I'm positive she saw me through the net curtains. I managed to dash upstairs and lock myself in the bedroom pretending to be asleep. Clare went back to school but has been acting differently to me ever since. What shall I do? Linda from Glasgow Stephanie says I feel that you might be panicking a bit here and jumping to hasty conclusions. You say that your daughter saw you through net curtains, in which case she would certainly not have seen you clearly if she was aware of you at all. Don't forget that young people can be moody and withdrawn for reasons quite unconnected with cross dressing. Cross dressing need not be a lonely, isolating hobby. Why not pop into the Transformation shop for a Changeaway and enjoy the peace and tranquillity of being with people who understand and where you will feel safe and secure. Hi Stephanie I have a dilemma, I have been dressing for 25 years now and more and more find myself wanting to take hormones, not all of them but just some of them to help me change just a little bit to feel more feminine. Hormones like Triple strength nipple development cream, female persona capsules and beard retardant cream. What would your advice be? Michaela, Yorkshire Stephanie says Dear Michaela I understand your need for a more profound feminine experience and hormones would certainly help you here. The hormone products found in the Transformation shops are mild, safe and effective. They are plant driven products which have a gentle positive effect on the male system as confirmed by 1000s of users over the years. Most importantly they are not prescription strength so they can be bought over the counter in our shops. To obtain more information on specific items and possible results please do not hesitate to phone or visit us at one of our Transformation shops. The staff would be delighted to help you. Kind Regards, Stephanie Every time I cross dress I get an erection. I do so want to experience your dressing up service and buy some breasts. Sorry I can’t afford the top ones. How can I control my urge so it doesn't happen when I’m being assisted by the lovely ladies in your shops, I’ve already spoken to Debbie, but couldn't tell her about this, she sounds so kind. Maria from Dublin Stephanie says Hi Maria, Having an erection at an inappropriate time, is a very real fear for a lot of men who dress. At the Transformation shops that fear is eliminated because you are given appropriate garments to use, whether you are trying to buy or having a changeaway make-over. You can of course buy similar garments made of fabric or latex rubber at the shop for use in the home. These are generally known by the name cache sex and works effectively to give a nice flat tummy. In answer to your second query regarding breasts even the most expensive are affordable these days with either a cheque spread or standing order mandate (interest free/ admin fee charged) There is a wide price range with affordable economy breasts that are very popular. Shops usually have sale breasts in stock. My advice always get the best you can afford. I’m 22 stone, a bricklayer, with hands like shovels. Please, please how can I be feminine? I’ve lots of things from Scope shops. I love silky feely skin. Cathy from Cambridge Stephanie says Hello Cathy, Women come in all shapes and sizes. Regardless of your male size you can still look and feel stunning. Charity shops serve a very useful purpose but are unlikely to stock female clothing in the sizes to fit you properly. You need a free personal advisory facility, readily available at any transformation shop. This would provide qualified help and advice and get a quick visual glimpse of your feminine possibilities. Don't forget they stock specialist items/ sizes/and clothing. Once you wear silicone breasts and corsetry, wow! You will definitely feel like a woman. Hormone cream could help with achieving silky feeling skin. Good luck! I've dressed in ladies underwear, my wife’s mainly for as long as I can remember, when I was only 8yrs old I remember pinching my sisters school knickers. I’m 46 years old, married with 3 kids. I can’t hide this anymore, I’m shaking as I write this. Emma from Newcastle Stephanie says Hi Emma, Please don't feel bad about dressing, you are doing nothing wrong or illegal, nor is masculinity threatening. If only everyone could be educated into the awareness of how harmless cross dressing is. Thank you for having the courage to send this Email. I would like you to talk to someone at Transformation. I need more information into regarding your circumstances, are you simply TV or could it possibly be that you feel you have more transsexual needs? Help can be forthcoming. So do not feel alone. My cousin has asked me to be a bridesmaid at her wedding, only Jenny knows I'm a crossdresser, what shall I do? Rebecca from Birmingham Stephanie says Wow! What a wonderful compliment. You must feel very flattered. Jenny obviously has a lot of confidence in your appearance and ability to pass as a "real" girl so why haven't you the same confidence? There will presumably be other family members present so why not discuss your fears with Jenny. Don't forget if you decline you do run the risk of offending and alienating a true friend. Only you can assess the risks involved but it sounds like too good an offer to miss. Just think of the beautiful dress which I'm sure you'll get to keep. Every time I go out cross-dressed I nip into the same newsagent to buy the latest Woman’s Own magazine. The owner always smiles and winks at me and last night he asked me out on a date. What shall I do? Maureen from Croydon Stephanie Says You sound as though you are passing very well indeed. being chatted up is what happens to us girls all the time so you'd better get used to it ! You must feel flattered even though you may not be interested in a date. It takes a lot of courage for a man to ask a girl out so let him down gently. I would wear a very broad wedding band the next time you go in or start shopping at a different newsagent. I'm "caught short" whilst out shopping in Selfridges Ladies Department and I'm desperate for the toilet, what do I do? Michelle from Derby Stephanie says This is a frequently asked question. Cross dressing is not illegal. However it can be construed as "a breach of the peace" if you use the ladies toilets whilst you are out dressed. To avoid any problems I would suggest you use the unisex disabled toilets which can be frequently found nowadays. If you are going out dressed self-confidence is very important so be sure to visit a Transformation Shop and have a professional, feminising makeover. This will guarantee you have the "know how" to always look your feminine best. They can also provide you with an identity card, stating you are a TV/TS. Presentation of this will help avoid any potential problems and reduce any feelings of vulnerability. Stephanie, what’s your advice about going out dressed. All I’ve ever done is go out with stockings, suspender belt and lacey knickers under my jeans and put red lipstick on whilst driving. Debbie from Edinburgh

Stephanie says

Lots of men wear feminine under-wear discreetly this is perfectly acceptable. I always advise against going out dressed half and half wearing both male and female clothing and makeup. Doing this you attract the wrong sort of attention. Please NEVER put lipstick on whatever the colour whilst driving. I can understand the thrill and anticipation of going out dressed but for safety reasons make sure you achieve the best possible feminine look by getting help and advice first (Transformation offer a free personal advisory service) One bad experience could seriously affect your confidence. When I'm dressed in my favourite hookers outfit I fantasise about being picked up by a man in a flashy jag. Am I gay? I love my wife and family. She knows about my secret habit but does not want anyone else to know. Mandy from Birmingham

Stephanie says

Most male TVS that dress are hot blooded heterosexual guys who are married or have a female partner. They would not be interested in other men sexually. Dressing is a fantasy world, you can be who or what you want to be and mentally create all manner of circumstances. Most men who dress respect and admire women tremendously and dream about what it would like to actually be a woman. Perhaps it is part of your bedroom routine this is your private business. It does not mean that you are gay or bi-sexual. You are most fortunate that your wife accepts your hobby and there is no reason why anyone else should find out. When your young son becomes older adjust your routine. But don’t worry for now just have fun! What’s the best way to put stiletto seam stockings on? I can never get the seams right Stacey from Bolton

Stephanie says

Always ensure that you have your toe nails cut short. Men sometimes forget to do this. Roll your stocking slowly up and over the ankle. It is a good idea to wear a suspender belt with six suspenders (available from transformation) rather than a conventional four. This would control the positioning of your stockings better. It is really a question of practice makes perfect. A good girlie tip for you – always purchase two pairs of stockings. The reason being if you ladder one you still have three stockings left. This is far more economical and your stockings will last longer. I’ve always had man boobs. I love them, am I a she male? Christine from Manchester

Stephanie says

Lots of TVS have man boobs some are natural and others are cultivated by taking hormone product. Some males fantasise about having breast but cannot have them because of personal circumstances. The reasons why males want breast are varied it could be a sexual connection or maybe your instincts are perhaps transsexual and you would like to feel more feminine naturally. She males have a tendency to go to more extreme lengths to have breast and have surgery with breast implants. They still however keep their penis. Generally (there are exceptions to every rule) she males are gay or bi sexual and possibly motivated by sexual reasons to appeal to a wider audience. Every time I buy Tights and Stockings they ladder straight away - why? Betty from Wolverhampton Stephanie says A common situation is that men forget to cut their toe nails, so make sure yours are nice and short, especially on your 'Big Toes'! Roll your stockings/tights slowly up from your ankle. This does take a bit of practice. Perhaps you need a thicker denier (texture) until you have had more experience, they are more robust to handle than flimsy nylon. Do not forget to always buy two pairs of stockings at a time, so if you do ladder one pair you have a spare pair. Transformation have an excellent selection of Tights and Stockings that you can purchase without embarrassment, including a range for longer legs. I am desperate to meet other people who dress. Sometimes I feel very lonely and isolated and would give anything to have a friend who understood! What do you suggest? Gina from Portsmouth Stephanie says Well Gina, you have quite a few options open to you. Obviously you could 'Chat on-line' and get to know people that way. If you arrange to meet anyone it’s always sensible to meet in a well-lit public place and tell someone where you are going. You could go along and experience a 'Changeaway at our Transformation shop'. It’s a great chance for some girlie fun and you will also make lots of new friends. Ring the Transformation shop on 0161 773 2572 for details. Hope this given you some ideas Gina. Good Luck there are plenty of people 'out there' who like you are keen to make new friends... Please advise, I am in a bit of a dilemma. I have a date with a lovely girl in a couple of weeks and would really like to get to know her better. I am terrified of her finding out that I am a cross-dresser. This is an instant worry and because of it I usually avoid getting involved, but I would love a partner. Should I tell her on our first date? Peter from Norwich

Stephanie says

Peter this is a frequently asked question and I can understand your concern. Some women do not understand at all just how harmless cross-dressing is. Some women do not mind being aware, but do not like to see it manifest. Then you get the women who don not mind at all and positively encourage the hobby. But don't let happiness pass you by, simply because of a fear. Life is about taking chances. Look forward to your date and remember it would not be appropriate to discuss anything of such a private intimate nature, so early in a relationship anyway. Proceed with caution by all means, but please do not let it hold you back. Some Men feel deceitful if they cannot be totally honest and whilst this is admirable in most circumstances, remember by dressing you are giving yourself a relaxation which is essential and necessary for you. This in turn makes you a calmer, better person for any relationships you are involved with. Why not be totally discreet and spend a few hours having a confidential make-over at one of our 'Transformation Shops' Good luck on your date I hope it goes well. My wife found my 'Girly Clothing' recently and has threatened to divorce me because she thinks I am odd. She wants me to go to counselling, but I know that I cannot give it up, I do not want to lose her. What can I do? Bob from Stockport

Stephanie says

You could try and explain just how harmless Cross-Dressing is and that it does not affect your sexuality. If that is a no go area and you want to retain the relationship, then I am afraid you have to be discreet in future and perhaps not dress at home. Remember (Transformation Cross-Dressing service at all our Shops). By all means go to counselling with your wife which could perhaps give you the safe opportunity to discuss issues with a third party, you could not discuss at home. You can also request to speak to the counsellor by yourself which might help you to come to terms with any negative feelings you might have about Cross-Dressing. You could of course also pop into the nearest Transformation Shop and have a chat with all our understanding staff. What can you suggest to hide my 'beard area', my make-up always seems to have a 'blue tinge' and I feel this is a dead giveaway when I go out dressed. Louise from Manchester

Stephanie says

For your make-up to last, you must use an 'oil based' foundation, applied sparingly with a damp sponge (Miracle Beard Cover Cream) and then set with the complimentary loose powder. Water based make-up products do not provide the necessary consistency for enduring cover. You can of course use the shop sold 'Hormone Based Cream' to minimise the growth rate and lighten the colour of the facial hair. Last week I was caught by my neighbour trying to take her underwear from her washing line, I am 65 years old recently retired. I was sure she was at work. I told her it would never happen again. She is always popping round for a chat with my wife, I am extremely worried she will tell her exactly what happened. Tom from Cheshire Stephanie says What a shame you did not think to say “the weather forecast predicted rain and you were doing her a good turn”. Perhaps you could still maintain that was the reason you were removing the washing, but her sudden appearance had frustrated you. If your wife mentions the situation that arose, you may have to bluster your way through! Lesson learned! Why be ‘impulsive’ and try to obtain underwear that would not fit you, when you could find undies that do. Transformation caters for any shapes and sizes without compromising on femininity. Pop into your nearest branch in Prestwich, Manchester, and see the gorgeous selection of products in store. Age is no barrier to cross-dressing, and now you are retired you can surely find the time. Happy Shopping…. Dear Stephanie, please help me… Its 8 weeks before I get married. My fiancée is not aware of my cross dressing interests. I am going to be so jealous when she walks down the aisle in her wedding dress. Should I tell her now? She knows I love sexy underwear, I am always buying it for her, and it is a great excuse to buy some for myself at the same time. We have a little girl just turned 2 Years Old. Andy from Reading Stephanie says My advice is to always get on the side of ‘caution’ when it comes to disclosing your dressing interests! Lots of people do not understand how harmless cross dressing is, and how it’s not related to your sexual orientation. Only you can calculate the ‘risks’ involved in telling your wife to be, and I sympathise because it is a very difficult decision to make! It is possible to run a parallel life and manifest your female self by enjoying a ‘makeover changeaway’ in one of our Transformation Shops, where you will always have unconditional acceptance by all our lovely staff. In this way you do not have to tell anyone ‘outside’, you will feel both calm and stress free in a safe environment at all times. This will surely make you a good Husband and Father in your home environment! Yes you will be jealous of how beautiful your wife will look in her Wedding Dress, and I am certain she will look stunning, but you can have the very same experience, and look just as stunning on a ‘Bride’s changeaway experience in our shop. I hope you enjoy a long and very happy marriage.

Nov 201520

Robyn's First Dress

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First Dress

It was the summer of 1972 and my fiancee and I had gone for two weeks of sun, sand and sangria on a package tour to Ibiza. Linda and I were getting married that autumn and this was our first real holiday away together, just the two of us with no friends or relatives to get in the way. I have been a transvestite for as long as I can remember, at least in the way that I had always fantasised about being dressed as a girl. It was a compulsive dream but not a compulsive act. Although I was 19 at that time, I had never worn a frock. On the first morning everyone was gathered together in the hotel lounge and told about the entertainment on offer during our holiday. There were trips across the island here and there, barbecues and discos, but it was one in particular that really excited me - a his 'n' hers party on the first saturday night. "It's not compulsory of course," said the bubbly rep with the long brown legs, "but most couples join in and it can be a real giggle." I could hardly believe my ears as she said it, but she did... "the girls come as the boys, and the boys come as the girls." Nearly thirty years later, I can remember that moment even now, as if it had only just happened. Linda was all for a bit of fun and we duly booked on almost every trip going. To my absolute delight, she was also keen on the his 'n' hers party. I tried to play it cool, but inside I was so excited I could hardly speak, and there was still four days to go... Somehow I kept myself together for the first two days, and never mentioned the party, but eventually I just had to talk about it. We had just been out to look at the place were they filmed South Pacific and were coming back to the coach when I asked Linda what we were both going to wear. I was so nervous I was sure she could tell. I just remember her saying we would have to sort it out when we got back, and I was too scared to say anything else. When we returned that afternoon she was as good as her word. I had the most wonderful time of my whole life, something I will never, ever forget. Linda soon chose the shirt and trousers she would wear on the night, and then it was my turn to be kitted out. I was in absolute heaven.

Real Life Transgender Stories I was taller than Linda but not much wider, so her dresses fitted me okay. She tried me in three or four different dresses, then various combinations of blouses and skirts, then back to the dresses and round again, over and over again while she made up her mind. This was what she was like when she was shopping for herself, never able to make up her mind and it would normally drive me mad. But this time I was the model, in her pretty clothes, and for once I wasn't complaining. In the end she decided on a long-sleeved Indian print dress in flowing cotton, a hippy style that could go well with sandals - shoe size was a problem, and there was no way I could have fitted into her size fives... So, that was my first dress. It was a mixture of blue, lavender, and pinkish hues in a soft, soft material that seemed to float with me as I walked. For me, it was a dream come true. By the time saturday night came I was so hyped up I was really scared I would do something silly, like confess to Linda or something like that, but I didn't, not that night anyway - I just had a ball! Linda seemed to be enjoying herself as well as she made up my face, not to Transformation standards admittedly - there was no beard cover and she didn't even bother with foundation - but just wearing lipstick, rouge and eyeshadow was a big enough thrill for me. I remember I couldn't resist continually licking my lips to remind myself that I really did have lipstick on. I had long hair in those days, so that was no problem, but Linda set it off with her wide straw hat with a pink silk scarf that tickled the back of my neck. When I looked in the mirror I thought I was the image of Marianne Faithful, although the lady herself could well have sued for slander if I had said so publicly. I half murmered it to Linda and she agreed, with a laugh, that she would call herself Mick. As Mick and Marianne I was sure we would win first prize, and of course if this was in TV fiction we would have done. But as it happened, we didn't. The honours went to a couple we didn't know, who were incredible. He must have been a TV, and she must have known. He was only about 5'6" with natural, shoulder length blonde hair and a neat little figure most of the women would have died for. He had on a bright red mini-dress with short puffed sleeves and knee-high boots. He was supposed to be Nancy Sinatra, and his wife, slightly taller than him, was Frank.

Nowadays, being a bit braver on the TV front than I once was, I would have asked him all sorts of questions, but then I didn't want to draw attention to myself. Perhaps if he was a real TV and is reading this he may get in touch and put me out of my misery. I'm still very curious as to what his wife thought about him being so much prettier than her... To complete my dream I would have given anything to have made love to Linda while we were still cross dessed, but there was no hope of that. I tried to kiss her but she wouldn't have it - "I'm not a lesbian, you know", she said curtly. End of dream. That holiday was not only the first time I dressed, it was also the last time for many years. Linda and I got married, and divorced, and although I was living on my own I still never came to terms with myself enough to actually buy my own clothes. That had to wait until I discovered Transformation. I now have my own wardrobe of dresses, skirts and suits and go out regularly about the town. However, Linda remains the only woman ever to have dressed me up, and despite our later quarrels I will never forget her for that. Ibiza is always in my mind. Robyn

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